A Stranger

For, to be a stranger is naturally a very positive relation; it is a specific form of interaction. 

-Georg Simmel 

It was the freezing night of January, 2011. I think it was around 9 PM. I was coming back from office by our very own metro. I chucked that metro at Rajeev Chowk station to board in blue line metro upstairs. It was actually very cold that night and I always hated winters and also I was very tired. I somehow gathered all of my courage and went upstairs, entered CCD, ordered one cappuccino. After a while, they brought my savior with a lovely heart made upon it. I was so happy. :)

After finishing my coffee, I hurried towards the book stall there, and purchased few magazines. While exiting the stall, I noticed a young girl sitting alone on the very last bench of that platform. She looked very depressing and I contemplated that she needed some kind of help. I initially thought to myself, it’s already too late for home and I am not Mother Teresa who would go and help anyone at this odd time, and you can’t really trust anyone just like that in today’s time. I was so confused. :\

But then, humanity struck me, I went toward that girl and sat beside her on that bench. She looked something around 15-16, and I could even notice few tears in her eyes. I looked around to see whether someone’s with her or not, maybe her parents or friends, but I couldn’t find anyone there related to her. I only saw few guys there continuously looking towards her. After a moment, I tried talking to her, ‘Hi..’ She looked disinterested. After a moment, I asked, ‘are you lost?’ She did look at me but with no reply. I thought what to do so that she could talk to me. For the final time, I said, ‘if you have any sort of problem, you could tell me, maybe I could just help..’ Finally this time, she replied:

She: I’m waiting for someone..

Me : Then, why are you in tears?

She: I’m waiting for someone since morning..

Suddenly she started crying very loudly, and her answer made me very confused. She was at emotional outburst and I thought she needed someone’s help desperately.

Me : (Trying to console her) Hey, don’t get too emotional, I don’t know your difficulty but trust me everything’s going to be okay with time. It’s already very late, you should be going back to your home.

She: (with a forced smile) Thanks!

I reciprocated to her smile and started to go towards my platform.

Suddenly she grasped my hands and started telling me the story of her life, why she was crying, whom she was waiting for and all that.

She was a student of class 12th and studied in a well known school of Delhi. Both mom and dad were working. Limited friends. Virtual world seemed as the real world. At this delicate stage of her age, her world revolved around one person-her boyfriend, for whom she was waiting since morning. Boyfriend found someone else hotter than her. Not answering her calls. He had promised her to meet at the station but didn’t appear.

Me : Don’t worry! He’ll realize it soon. Just accept the reality. Try forgetting him. It may seem like to you that you are not able to forget him, but gradually you will. I can give you that in written.

She: Yeah, but..(she paused for a moment) I think you’re right. Talking to you and sharing my problems made me feel very relieved. Thanks a lot!

Me : Now get up and head towards your house without stopping anywhere and all with a smiling face.

We both hugged each other and started making a way towards our house.

It was a very distinctive conversation that I shared with someone who was complete stranger to me. I am a kind of girl who usually doesn’t talk much with any stranger. But still, I want to ask, why it happens sometimes that you can't even share your delicate feelings even with your loved ones and you don't even hesitate telling those feelings to someone you don't even know? Maybe because your closed ones know you very well and they could react to your views or feelings. They cannot stop being judgmental at your emotions. 

Today, I feel that sometimes you just need a shoulder to cry on, you need someone who can listen to your problems without being hypercritical, and it really doesn’t matter if that person is complete stranger to you.

Our life is made of several moments, few laughters, little tears and lots of emotions. At times, you wish you had someone who would listen to all your worries without judging you. The emotional bond that I shared with that stranger at that odd time, I felt was inevitable. That connection was so unique that without knowing each other’s name and background, we shared a very surreptitious piece of our life.

Even here in blogging world, we keep writing about our personal moments and feelings without any hesitation in front of several strangers and, thus, making our life an open book. You write almost everything here that you could not share with your closest friends or parents. You just need a space to give vent to your emotions. And at times, when you’re at emotional outburst, a stranger can make you feel lively again. At this point of time, I remember these lines said by German philosopher Georg Simmel in his famous article ‘The Stranger’:

A stranger is far enough away that he is unknown but close enough that it is possible to get to know him. In a society there must be a stranger. If everyone is known then there is no person that is able to bring something new to everybody. The stranger bears a certain objectivity that makes him a valuable member to the individual and society. People let down their inhibitions around him and confess openly without any fear. This is because there is a belief that the Stranger is not connected to anyone significant and therefore does not pose a threat to the confessor’s life. On one hand the stranger’s opinion does not really matter because of his lack of connection to society, but on the other the stranger’s opinion does matter because of his lack of connection to society. He holds a certain objectivity that allows him to be unbiased and decide freely without fear. He is simply able to see, think, and decide without being influenced by the opinion of others. (Wikipedia)