Be a MAN, respect women!

Hi all, it’s quite a long time since I have posted anything on my sweet blog. :) So, what’s up with everyone? Aal iz well or naat? o_O

Now, after all these funny formalities, one a serious note let me ask you all a question. What is the first thing and/or word you land upon when I say ‘woman’? I asked him the same question and he landed up saying the worst quote ever “a source of getting a few seconds of orgasm”.  And, I was like, what did he just say..is he drunk or what? After a couple of minutes, I walked away.

To be true, most of the men are bastards, and I say this without a single doubt. They’ll talk about women emancipation, their freedom, their education, their rights and what not? But deep down within, they still treat women as a mere thing and would compare them to furniture, animals and the comparisons don’t stop.

Tell me, what do you think about women?

A poor little creature who is fully obsessed with pink?

A source of getting few moments of pleasure?

A fool who keeps crying over stupid things?

A creature that bleeds for a week and still doesn’t die?

Her boobs and curvy ass turns you on?

Someone who easily takes over your jobs or opportunities on the basis of mushy talks, appearance or gender?

A source behind every feud?

A moron who keeps a record of your balance and even fights over a single rupee?

If a woman reminds you of any of the above idea, then you’re the biggest chu***a on this earth! No offence though I care a damn!

Guys, she is faaaar better than you all. She loves you, cares for you and will do anything, mind it ANYTHING on this earth just to make you happy.

Now when I am still not over that quote of him, I feel like slapping him hard on face and shouting it out loud, ‘saale is this the reason why you keep crying over a single girl every time we meet?’

For all those male chauvinists who are always talking/speaking/writing shit about a lady, grow up because:

She is a caring mother.

She is a naughty yet helpful sister.

She is a loyal girlfriend.

She is a devoted wife.

She is a loving daughter.

She is a kind grandmother.

Look at her and you’ll feel the divinity!

You’re here BECAUSE she is here. She goes through terrible pain and that too without a single complaint or fear and gives birth to your baby, nephew, niece, grandson, granddaughter. She is a mine of relations.

Respect her and love her!

PS: And, if the above post doesn't bring even a tiny alteration to your ugly perception about women, then dude, have fun and don’t show me your face ever again! It was NEVER nice meeting you!

-Sanjana

Learning from moments..

Today, I was just sitting in my room and was thinking about the previous day, actually it was my birthday yesterday and I have completed 23 years on this earth (you can wish me belated happy b’day :P). Just imagine, 23 years! I mean I can’t believe that I am 23 years old because I don’t behave like a 23 year old girl and this thought of me has been approved by my parents, siblings and friends.

But today, for me, another year passed. I mean for me, new year starts from 26th July and when I look back I realize that I have lost so many things, gained few things and new experiences, hurt a lot of people, tried to make few people smile etc.

All the ups and downs of life I have seen last year are experiences for me now. All that is past now but it’s still within me just like a smile that stays on your face after a huge laughter. Last year was full of surprises and shocks. I have got so many beautiful moments, they were like dream come true, just the way I have imagined in my dreams. And if it comes to shock, I would never like to relive those moments, never!

You know something, knowing yourself is never easy. Each and every time when you are hundred percent sure of knowing yourself, your inner face changes its color so quickly that when you look yourself in mirror, it reflects of someone else, and you’re shocked!

I believe with every passing moment, you become someone else. Moments are mysterious in nature, you never know what’s at the other end of that moment, whether you’d be super happy or you’d be broken. And when you’re done with that particular moment, you’re again shocked!

And these are the things you don’t have any control on, you just have to see it and do nothing because you really can’t do anything. But few changes are for good and they transform your persona in a good way making you more magnificent and mature enough to handle odd situations. Like last year, I have travelled alone for the first time, I even bribed few cops ( it’s a secret not to be told in this era of Anna Hazare and Ramdev Baba but still I am confessing it and I care a damn about it ), jumped into the fight of two morons for no reason, watched movies, cried like an infant, hurt the feeling of few peoples and I even lied.

Last year also demanded honest answers of several questions but I am afraid I have ‘shortage of answers’. I try so hard to run away from these unanswered questions, sometimes I fill few of them in my cupboards, and few of them are crushed beneath my feet, I even try to burn them up but every time they are born again to bug me every moment.

I don’t know what this coming year holds for me. I have no idea whether it will make me smile or make me go crazy. I am not sure whether the coming moments will be preferred one or not but it will be interesting and that is for sure.

A Stranger

For, to be a stranger is naturally a very positive relation; it is a specific form of interaction. 

-Georg Simmel 

It was the freezing night of January, 2011. I think it was around 9 PM. I was coming back from office by our very own metro. I chucked that metro at Rajeev Chowk station to board in blue line metro upstairs. It was actually very cold that night and I always hated winters and also I was very tired. I somehow gathered all of my courage and went upstairs, entered CCD, ordered one cappuccino. After a while, they brought my savior with a lovely heart made upon it. I was so happy. :)

After finishing my coffee, I hurried towards the book stall there, and purchased few magazines. While exiting the stall, I noticed a young girl sitting alone on the very last bench of that platform. She looked very depressing and I contemplated that she needed some kind of help. I initially thought to myself, it’s already too late for home and I am not Mother Teresa who would go and help anyone at this odd time, and you can’t really trust anyone just like that in today’s time. I was so confused. :\

But then, humanity struck me, I went toward that girl and sat beside her on that bench. She looked something around 15-16, and I could even notice few tears in her eyes. I looked around to see whether someone’s with her or not, maybe her parents or friends, but I couldn’t find anyone there related to her. I only saw few guys there continuously looking towards her. After a moment, I tried talking to her, ‘Hi..’ She looked disinterested. After a moment, I asked, ‘are you lost?’ She did look at me but with no reply. I thought what to do so that she could talk to me. For the final time, I said, ‘if you have any sort of problem, you could tell me, maybe I could just help..’ Finally this time, she replied:

She: I’m waiting for someone..

Me : Then, why are you in tears?

She: I’m waiting for someone since morning..

Suddenly she started crying very loudly, and her answer made me very confused. She was at emotional outburst and I thought she needed someone’s help desperately.

Me : (Trying to console her) Hey, don’t get too emotional, I don’t know your difficulty but trust me everything’s going to be okay with time. It’s already very late, you should be going back to your home.

She: (with a forced smile) Thanks!

I reciprocated to her smile and started to go towards my platform.

Suddenly she grasped my hands and started telling me the story of her life, why she was crying, whom she was waiting for and all that.

She was a student of class 12th and studied in a well known school of Delhi. Both mom and dad were working. Limited friends. Virtual world seemed as the real world. At this delicate stage of her age, her world revolved around one person-her boyfriend, for whom she was waiting since morning. Boyfriend found someone else hotter than her. Not answering her calls. He had promised her to meet at the station but didn’t appear.

Me : Don’t worry! He’ll realize it soon. Just accept the reality. Try forgetting him. It may seem like to you that you are not able to forget him, but gradually you will. I can give you that in written.

She: Yeah, but..(she paused for a moment) I think you’re right. Talking to you and sharing my problems made me feel very relieved. Thanks a lot!

Me : Now get up and head towards your house without stopping anywhere and all with a smiling face.

We both hugged each other and started making a way towards our house.

It was a very distinctive conversation that I shared with someone who was complete stranger to me. I am a kind of girl who usually doesn’t talk much with any stranger. But still, I want to ask, why it happens sometimes that you can't even share your delicate feelings even with your loved ones and you don't even hesitate telling those feelings to someone you don't even know? Maybe because your closed ones know you very well and they could react to your views or feelings. They cannot stop being judgmental at your emotions. 

Today, I feel that sometimes you just need a shoulder to cry on, you need someone who can listen to your problems without being hypercritical, and it really doesn’t matter if that person is complete stranger to you.

Our life is made of several moments, few laughters, little tears and lots of emotions. At times, you wish you had someone who would listen to all your worries without judging you. The emotional bond that I shared with that stranger at that odd time, I felt was inevitable. That connection was so unique that without knowing each other’s name and background, we shared a very surreptitious piece of our life.

Even here in blogging world, we keep writing about our personal moments and feelings without any hesitation in front of several strangers and, thus, making our life an open book. You write almost everything here that you could not share with your closest friends or parents. You just need a space to give vent to your emotions. And at times, when you’re at emotional outburst, a stranger can make you feel lively again. At this point of time, I remember these lines said by German philosopher Georg Simmel in his famous article ‘The Stranger’:

A stranger is far enough away that he is unknown but close enough that it is possible to get to know him. In a society there must be a stranger. If everyone is known then there is no person that is able to bring something new to everybody. The stranger bears a certain objectivity that makes him a valuable member to the individual and society. People let down their inhibitions around him and confess openly without any fear. This is because there is a belief that the Stranger is not connected to anyone significant and therefore does not pose a threat to the confessor’s life. On one hand the stranger’s opinion does not really matter because of his lack of connection to society, but on the other the stranger’s opinion does matter because of his lack of connection to society. He holds a certain objectivity that allows him to be unbiased and decide freely without fear. He is simply able to see, think, and decide without being influenced by the opinion of others. (Wikipedia) 

Yes, I Miss You: A confession!

“You never know what you have until you lose it, and once you lose it, you can never get it back.”

It happens that sometimes you feel so odd and gloomy and when you look for a reason for this dimness, you actually fail to find any reason. Why? Is it because you are not happy with your present day? Or maybe your life? Or maybe your phone didn’t ring that day? Or is it because you suddenly start missing someone? 

Okay, tell me one thing. How it feels when you start missing someone for no reason? I personally believe that it’s not necessary to have a reason to miss someone. It’s your right to miss anything or anybody without any solid reason. When I go to any tour or trip, I miss my family. When I’m with my family, I, at times, miss my friends. I even miss my cousins, relatives and my grandmother residing in different cities. But one thing is for sure, they are just a call away, so I don’t feel gloomy. I just call them, eat their mind out and then this *missing someone volcano* which had erupted few moments ago cools down.

But what if you start missing someone with whom you don’t have any type of contact? What if you get a strong urge to talk to that person again after years? Suddenly, you start realizing that deep down in your heart you still think about that person, and still you feel for that person. You’re shocked! You’re amazed! Why is it happening again? You try to run away from this strange feeling, in fact you try very hard. Later, you realize that the more you try to run away from this feeling, the more you get wrapped up in these weird wires of emotions.

What to do now? You don’t want to get through this outlandish sensation all over again. You shed tears, you cry and you scream. You now start looking for something to get you engaged, so that you don’t start missing that person again. But everything goes in vain, you don't have any choice but to confess to yourself, that yes, still you miss that someone. Believe me, missing someone is a very terrible emotion, because it’s something on which you don’t have any control.

Recently, I was going through these brainless emotions. It was really bad, I was missing someone with whom I have not talked for years. It was, in fact, very strange because I never had missed that person in recent years. Now, I really wish to talk to that person. I curse myself for letting that person go so easily.

I only can say that, you may not realize the worth of a person till the time he’s with you. You only realize it when you don’t have that person to guide you, to smile you and to love you. You realize that you’re so hollow without that special one. Now, there’s no one who would actually listen to your rubbish without any complaints. Actually, you’re so incomplete.

Trust me, never let anyone go from your life easily. You may regret it later.

 

Paradigm Shift!

Below is the article which I had read years ago in a magazine, and I truly loved this article! Believe me, this article really inspires me sometimes and always makes me smile. I just thought to share it with you guys :)

Imagine you’re in Delhi’s International airport. While you’re waiting for your flight, you notice a kiosk selling cookies. You buy a box, put them in your traveling bag and patiently search for an available seat so that you can sit down and enjoy your cookies.

Finally, you find a seat next to a gentleman. You reach down into your traveling bag and pull out your box of cookies.

As you do so, you notice that the gentleman starts watching you intently. He stares as you open the box and his eyes follow your hand as you pick up the cookie and bring it to your mouth. Just then he reaches over and takes one of your cookies from the box and eats it! You’re more than a little surprised at this. Actually, you’re at a loss for words. Not does he take one cookie, but also alternates with you. For every one cookie you take, he takes one.

Now, what’s your immediate impression of this guy? Crazy? Greedy? He’s got some nerve! Can you imagine the words you might use to describe this man to your associates back at your school, college, office or whatever?

Meanwhile, you both continue eating the cookies until there’s just one left. To your surprise, the man reaches over and takes it. But then he does something unexpected. He breaks it in half and gives half to you. After he finished with his half he gets up and without a word, he leaves.

You think to yourself, “Does this really happen?” You’re left sitting there dumbfounded and still hungry. So you go back to the kiosk and buy another box of cookies. You the return to your seat and begin opening your new box of cookies when you glance down into your traveling bag. Sitting there in your bag is your original box of cookies- still unopened.

Only then you realize that when you reached down earlier, you had reached into the other man’s bag and grabbed his box of cookies by mistake.

Now what do you think of the man? Generous? Tolerant? You’ve just experienced a profound paradigm shift. You’re seeing things from a new point of view. 

Is it time to change your point of view? Now, think of this incident as it relates to your life. Things may not be what they seem.

Don’t pay too much attention to what you’re already seeing…but to what you’re missing.

Young Forever!

Few days back, one interesting thing happened.  It was kind of very soothing night here in Delhi, slightly cold breeze and partially clear sky. I was enjoying every bit of this lovely weather while standing in my balcony. Suddenly my ears heard few calming tunes of black and white era. Okay, after a minute I was able to recognize the song, it was, ‘Zindagi bhar nahi bhoolegi woh barsaat ki raat..’ and I too started humming this song, actually to be true I was not humming, I was literally screaming. All of a sudden my neighbor came outside in his balcony and started staring me. He then asked me whether I like this song. I nodded my head in agreement. Then we just started talking on random topics and laughed and gossiped. Then his wife also joined us in his balcony and later I came to know that it was wife’s birthday and they were celebrating it and were dancing on that song which I was trying to sing in my very high pitched voice few moments back. Then they invited me to join them in their celebration, and I was like, okay..I am just coming in a bit. I was back at my room and was searching my cupboards for a book to wrap it up quickly and give it to them as a gift. The book was a Hindi novel named as ‘Gunaahon ke Devta’ by Dharamvir Bharti. (I only have read few pages of this book, and I find this novel too filmy. Basically, I don’t like anything and/or anyone which/who is filmier than me :P) I always wanted to get rid of this book, and this occasion, I felt, was the bestest chance to get rid of it. ;)

Next moment, I gave them their book, and they were like..areh arreh, iski kya jarurat thi and I murmured to myself I don’t care whether you need it or not but I truly need to get rid of this book :P. Later they offered me a big piece of cake (if somehow I would have known that they would be offering me this ultra big piece of cake, then I would really not have joined them in their party because I hate cakes X-( ) While I was trying to eat that super big piece of cake, I noticed that there were only three people in that room and it was really odd to see an old couple to celebrate any occasion this blissfully without their sons or daughters or relatives. So I enquired them about their family, education, social life, favorite movies and songs and blah blah like any FBI agent. And they even patiently answered my each and every question. They have only one son who lives abroad and comes to India once or twice in 3-4 years. Even when he is home he spends most of his time with his friends. I noticed that they became very emotional while talking about their beloved son and I could even see their wrinkled eyes getting wet, but at the very same time they told me that they don’t hold any grudges against their son instead they feel happy that their son is very well settled in some European country. But actually, I could sense the pain in those happy words.

But still I was so puzzled that this couple is so aged (they were something around 65 or 70), how they have managed to be so happy and still so healthy, so I asked them this question. You know what they said? They said, ‘LOVE’, love for each other which is still as fresh as morning’s air and as sacred as the Geeta. Believe me, this one word answer touched my soul. I never had expected this answer, and I couldn’t say anything but just smile.

I now meet them almost every day and trust me I never have seen this couple worried or sad. I don’t know from where they get so much passion and courage to lead this life so delightfully. They play badminton and volleyball with little kids in our apartment, they sing, they dance, they crack jokes and they are so much in love with each other and most importantly they respect this miracle called ‘life’. I believe, they have something extra ordinary in them and I am still wondering what that extra ordinary thing is.

Humph, I guess that’s what we call ‘Living life king size’ :P, but jaate jaate ek sher arz hai ;)

“Apni jawani ka gurur kisko hai Ghalib, Jawani umra se nahi karishme se jhalakni chahiye..”

Two shameful moments!

Anshan is finally over, but not worth it.

Nobody cared!

Above in the two different photos, lays two shameful moments for the world’s largest democracy.  In the first photograph, all the saints and spiritual gurus across the India gathered at the Himalayan hospital in Jollygrant in Dehradun to request Yoga guru Baba Ramdev to chuck his ‘so-called’ Anshan against corruption and black money. And in the second one, a 34-year old ascetic, Swami Nigamanada who had been fasting for almost four months to protest illegal mining and stone crushing along the Ganga near Haridwar died at the same hospital in Dehradun on Monday.

My first reaction after seeing this disturbing news on TV was like, ‘ohh f*ck man, where’s India heading..’ Believe it or not, but this news seemed to me a very serious problem for India and Indians. I mean, after 2 weeks of so much media hype and chaos in the country and after the verbal war between different political parties for Ramdev, Baba finally took off his anshan without any conclusion, and the very same day we hear about the demise of Swami Nigamananda. These two news, are so very much politically, socially and morally contradicting.

It was not even an hour that Baba Ramdev was shifted to hospital and many ministers, spiritual gurus started visiting him but not even a single minister or guru cared to take a look of Swami Nigamananda. Why so? Is it because Swami Nigamananda’s anshan was not a VIP anshan or maybe he didn’t chose Delhi for his anshan or is it because he sat on anshan to save our national river Ganga in Haridwar which is considered highly sacred and pious for us?

I am so confused, shocked and don’t have any answers for these questions.  Do you have any answers? 

Let's NOT talk about Marriage!

Okay, here I start! Although I am single and unmarried but I do have quite a number of YOUNG friends who are married.  My married female friends are like the happiest women on this earth. They keep bragging about their hubbies and how their life changed after this miracle called- Marriage. But the thing is not same with most of my male friends. I am not saying that they are NOT happy but their condition is like they are trapped and they would often tell me that ‘ SHE’ was really not like this before and blah blah, and I just keep listening to them, because that’s the only thing I could do and also I don’t  have any experience about marriage to share.

 

Picture Courtesy: lisalessingcounselor.wordpress.com

At my previous office, my editor gave me a topic to write for the weekly column for the newspaper and the topic was ‘Marriage and Youngistan’. After that I roamed around the entire office, upstairs, downstairs and met every single employee there who was married.  I questioned my floor warden who was 29 and married that, ‘are you happy being married’? He told me that, ‘you know Sanjana, being married and being happy are two different things…’ and he laughed. Even today, I wonder why the hell he laughed that day. 

 

Picture Courtesy:theallareequal.com

My male colleagues kept telling me that Love is blind but marriage is the tool that opens up your eyes. Bleh!  And I used to give them weird look and they used to reciprocate to it. :| I couldn’t even believe that day when one of my colleagues sent me an e-mail containing several jokes on marriage.  All men are stupid, I used to murmur it to myself!  Shaddi ke baad girlfriend chudeil ban jaati hai aur pati ka band baj jaata hai…ladkiyan itna kharcha kyu karti hain? And they kept going on till the day I really submitted my article.

 Picture Courtesy:spinachflame.wordpress.com

There were many researches and surveys done on how to live a long life and the result which came out apparently was marriage. My friend, Vikas told me this when I was assigned to write this article. I was really thankful to him for helping me with this article but after that little help, I myself had no idea that he would give me a huge lecture on this topic. He said, ‘I don’t know why but this result never convinces me. I mean, according to this result, if you wish to live long, you should marry?  Is this a joke? Maybe after marriage, one realizes that chuck the thought of living long because after that your thinking ability gets lost and one also realizes that you cannot live for long time peacefully now.’ I was stunned to hear all this crap from his mouth because he was the one who was in a relationship with a girl from more than past 2 years and also was married to her but their respective family wasn’t aware of all this. Moreover, he used to talk to her girlfriend on phone all time long even at working hours and everybody on the floor knew about his secret love.  I personally was very much interested in his love story and always tried to inquire from him that how you guys met and how you guys fell for each other and how this secret marriage happened and all that.

 Picture Courtesy:humor-pics.blogspot.com

But that day I realized one fact about Vikas that he is no different from other guys and men always will be men. Afterwards I even asked Vikas that why he’s saying like this? And after that, I couldn’t believe my eyes, he actually started sulking and his first dialogue was, ‘main toh phans gaya yaar’ and I said, ‘kya baat kar raha hai yaar?’  Further he told me that he fell for a wrong girl, she doesn’t give him his space and always force him to tell everything about them to his family and he told me many things and at the end I was so irritated and so confused that I was at loss of words and had no reaction to his situation. 

 Picture Courtesy:cartoonbank.com

I am not saying that every man is like my friend Vikas but most of them are like him or maybe they only show that they don’t really like this institution named marriage but within they are one romantic chap who would love their wife truly, madly and deeply. 

I wonder why there isn’t any love story or poem made on any married couple (Please don’t name Baagbaan :P)? Why we only get to see heart wrenching love stories like Romeo and Juliet or Laila-Majnu? 

 Picture Courtesy:blogs.rockymountainnews.com

There are numerous jokes made on this interesting topic, where you get to see the pity condition of a poor guy called husband, and a lady wearing loads of make-up enjoying her status of being a wife. I wonder, why do they portray wife as a demon? :| 

 Picture Courtesy:cartoonstock.com

It is said that marriages are made in heaven, so why are we not even happy with god’s decision?  Hmm..that's a tricky question! Lets really NOT talk about marriage!

Yeh Pyaar Kya Hai?

Aisa Hota hai Kya? :P Give your views?

You know what happened in metro?

It was 11’O clock and I was already 15 minutes late as I rushed towards to the road to grab an auto to depart me at the nearest metro station.  It was really a cold morning and it seemed like it could rain anytime. Anyways, within 10 minutes I was at the station and I hurriedly climbed the stairs and made an entry and reached the platform to catch the Dwarka metro while managing to inform my friend at Rajouri that I am half an hour late. Although I was at Preet Vihar station and it would be taking 40 or 45 minutes for me to reach that part of Delhi. Knowing this on the call, she shouted at me and told me that I better reach there within 20 minutes which was off course, IMPOSSIBLE.  Somehow I managed to calm her down and asked her to make a call to her boyfriend or do some shopping alone till the time I reach there. 

Finally metro arrived and I boarded in the first coach i.e. the ladies coach. :) How lucky I was that the coach wasn’t that occupied and I had plenty of seats for me to choose my favorite one to sit. At the next station, many ladies boarded in and two aunties sat near me. One of them confirmed from me that whether she is sitting in the right metro or not and later asked me from where I boarded in, what I do, where am I going and why am I going and it seemed like she is not going to stop throwing these random questions at me. To be true, I was really annoyed. Firstly, I was so late and my friend’s continuous SMSs added to the annoyance and secondly, I was having a very bad ache in my wisdom tooth(I wonder why they call it wisdom tooth?) that made me so frustrated, and all that wasn’t enough that now this lady is eating my mind. Thankfully, my cell rang and that call was made my Vodafone asking me to choose my favorite song and put it as my caller tune and blah blah. I really used to hate such calls but this time it seemed like a life saver for me and somehow made that lady lose her interest in me. But that lady was really talkative and by some means she started a conversation with the lady beside her seat.  15 minutes passed on and I didn’t know why but now I was just not able to stop myself from hearing their talks. 

These ladies started talking about the love life of their children. The lady who was initially talking to me was very much frustrated from her only son. His son fell for a girl in his locality and want to marry her but this lady is really not ready for this and wants her son to get married to a girl of her choice. But his son is really mad for the girl and he had warned his mother that if she is not going to support his choice, he will run away or do something that will make the mother regret not letting him marry that girl. 

Same is the condition for other lady but in her case her second daughter is creating the chaos in the house and is not eating anything, chucked her studies and not talking to anyone in the family because she wants to get married to her boyfriend whom she loves madly. 

What I made out from their conversations is that both the ladies are puzzled and are worried about their children’s future. Both the ladies love their kids a lot and want them to be happy always but they don’t really want their kids to get married to a person who will keep them happy forever which the ladies really fail to understand. 

Although in the end, one damn funny thing happened. Later in the conversation, they discovered that they both are enemies actually.  In fact, the ‘only’ son of the lady besides me had fallen for the ‘second’ daughter of the lady besides her. And I was like ‘what?’  aisa to Ekta Kapoor ke tv soaps mein hota hai… Believe me, it was that much shocking for me also as it proved to be for those ladies. But the only difference was that I was able to laugh! 

I believe, love is such a simple thing! Why they make it so complicated, I wonder!

Anyways, I reached my destination and hurried downwards to meet my friend in excitement just to tell her ‘you know what happened in metro?’ :P

Image Courtesy: thehindu.com